Ramblings of An Insane Child

TAROT

 My reading, above.

I was just going to go to bed, before I felt a nudge on the top of my head (more like a light stroke). I knew I had to draw Three Cards from my Rider Waite tarot deck. I shuffled the cards and cleared them first, then shuffled again with my intention in mind: “What should I say on the blog?”. I knew my Angelic Guides were showing me to post again. Apart from hearing their many voices, voices I have never heard in my life, might I add – I get slight energetic nudges either on my head or shoulders. I soon realised why; any other spot would freak me out, as I am not accustomed to hearing stories of people being nudged otherwise.

The card that stood out to me the most was the last card, the Nine of Wands. As I was looking at it to get a closer view (I should first pause this post to state that other than hearing voices I see the imagery move and can see flashes of many orbs with the naked eye) a lot of old emotions came crashing down. I remember constantly being told by my peers and people who surrounded me, that what I was into was hogwash and Black Magic. I know what you’re all thinking; How can orbs be black magic? What Demon would communicate with someone through bright lights and slight nudges? My sentiments growing up, exactly. I was constantly told I am not pious enough or covered enough to ever receive Angelic words, let alone hear them. Who am to receive messages from Angels? Clearly to them I didn’t do enough good, see enough misery and putridness or wasn’t a good enough person. Well, that is where this blog comes in. I finally know who I am. A witch. A witch of duality. A witch of strength. A witch of truth.

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“When you are hanging in there, persevering under pressure and holding on despite the forces pulling at the other end of your rope, expect the Nine of Wands to appear in your Tarot reading. This card is either a welcome sign that you are truly holding your own in a long-term project or that you are needlessly hanging on to a point of view that is past its time.”

The paragraph above was pasted from KEEN.com

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That is me. Hanging on by a thread to my negativity. Repeating all the words people have ever said to me and using that as a mechanism to avoid going any further. Repeating all the times I have used my good and sound judgment to say “I don’t think that is what she meant” or “Maybe she said that or looked at me funny because she was tired” to justify putting the truth in a cupboard and shutting it closed.

I can’t deny myself the freedom to accept the truth anymore. I am not ordinary. I should not pretend to be, when I have gifts to rely on. Voices I hear and see vividly in my dream, dreams I wake up from dazed and confused because I think I am still in them.

The Last Thirteen words from KEEN’s website left an impact. I am no longer going to hold on to a point of view that is past time. A point of view that will either have me on one side or another, overtly angry or passive for the sake of fun.

Then the other two cards spoke to me after the last. The Ace of Swords finally spoke to me. I noticed the hand moving and gripping the sword tightly, showing me how I can once and for all get the mental clarity I deserve.

Then finally, the last. The Knight of Pentacles telling me this is my job. This is where I will find material gains not only for me, but the highest good of all.

Gryphon

Wow. I don’t think I have ever been so honest in my life, with myself too. I would love to hear your stories – good or bad, if you would be so kind to share.

Blessed Be

Thajba

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